TWO BECOME ONE

One Doctor is himself AND his wife. But no one knows – no one can tell. Hijinks arise as he tries to co-ordinate two lives while attempting to maintain the guise of a normal two person marriage.
We eventually discover that his REAL wife has died (possibly he murdered and consumed her?) and he has been covering for her ever since.
‘Mrs Doubtfire’ meets ‘Psycho’ in the most stressful and farfetched sitcom on television.

Your Tax Dollars - My Dollars

I like to do things to unnerve my colleagues. Just to make sure they don’t quite get me...but let’s be honest, it’s mainly to pass time that I wish was passing elsewhere – my job is worse than Ron Howard.

Example 1 - Taking photos of their backs and emailing it to them:

Example 2 – Sending them creepy lymericks:

There once was a great payroll team
Nichole, Shellie, Flynn Lisa, Sween
They processed the leave
And timesheets received
While building a friendship of dreams.

Example 3 - Drawing various pictures (such as the below), and posting them up around the office:

There are plenty of other cases of which I don't have, or can't be bothered giving, proof for, such as setting up overzealous christmas decorations and leaving them up for the rest of the year only to take them down a week before the following christmas; Building a shrine of different photos of myself on one of the filing cabinets; building shrines of other people in the office on other filing cabinets; recording the many farts of the many toilet visits and playing them to people at inappropriate times...the list really does go on. I'm thinking about creating an art installation with all of these included - "Your Tax Dollars, My Dollars".

In light of the intensely misogynist top 100 of all time, here is my top 100 songs of all time performed by a female (in alphabetical order):

Aretha Franklin – RESPECT
Beyonce – Deja Vu
Bjork – All Is Full Of Love
Deadstar – Deeper Water
Dusty Springfield – Son Of A Preacher Man
The Knife – Heartbeats
Peaches – Fuck The Pain Away
Pixies – Gigantic
PJ Harvey – Good Fortune
Yeah Yeah Yeahs – Maps

Housewarming (among other things)

Shoutin' "LAGER, LAGER, LAGER"

The Curse of Rob Fleming

The last three days have been some of the most stressful I’ve endured. The amount of concentration, rumination and focus I’ve had to apply to the task at hand has been completely overwhelming. In fact I really didn’t think I was going to make it, I thought the anxiety would sweep me under like a shell in the undertow. But eventually I prevailed; emerged victorious! So without further adieux, I give you my JJJ top 10 of all time (in reverse alphabetical order):

Yeah Yeah Yeahs - Maps
Weezer – Say It Ain’t So
The Verve – Bitter Sweet Symphony
Sigur Ros – Saeglopur
Refused – New Noise
Oasis – Don’t Look Back In Anger
Kings Of Leon – King Of The Radio
The Jackson Five – I Want You Back
David Bowie – Heroes
...And You Will Know Us By The Trail Of Dead – Relative Ways

What an ordeal.